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About Mary Kay

My name is Mary Kay Cocharo. Who am I and what's my interest in gratitude?

I am a woman in mid-life. I have been a student of one kind or another for about 50 years. I have been a psychotherapist for 23 years and a Certified Imago Relationship Therapist for 12 of those.

In addition to having had the privilege of counseling hundreds of adults, adolescents and children, I have led and taught numerous workshops and classes. Some of my favorite topics include, "Beating the Holiday Blues", "Intimacy and Friendship", "Couplehood as a Spiritual Path", "Divorce Recovery" and "Gender Differences in Relationships".

I have been a mother for nearly 27 years and am a daughter, sister, aunt, niece, cousin and a wife.

I am a friend. I am, and always have been, someone who seeks to find deeper and richer connection to all things spiritual.

As a psychotherapist, I've been an observer of humanity. I've seen suffering and have had the privilege of sharing in joy. I've heard many stories. I have been moved to tears, heartbroken, silenced, stimulated, and uplifted. My clients have been students and teachers and blessings.

I have practiced Catholicism, learned to meditate, done yoga and studied Buddhism. I have Jewish and Muslim friends and have served as a board member for a Church of Religious Science. I believe in an intelligent Universe and I believe in the power of thought. I know that grateful people are happier people.

In fall of 2007, I participated in The 40 day Gratitude Groove with one of my girlfriends. I've always believed that it takes 40 consecutive days to both learn a new habit and evolve spiritually through that new discipline . My Gratitude Girlfriend partner was going through a bitter divorce, and we tended to spend all of our time together complaining. I noticed that many of our pre-GG exchanges were based on commiseration, not celebration of our lives. I thought that focusing on gratitude would not only help us personally but would also be good for our friendship.

On the day that I received my first Gratitude Groove email, my husband was diagnosed with Undifferentiated Squamous Cell Carcinoma of the Head and Neck. This is a fancy name for cancer. It was almost as if the Universe was saying, "Oh yeah, let's see if you can find some gratitude in this?!"

The next week was a whirlwind of doctor's appointments, biopsies, second opinions, research, and shock. It was also a week of prayer, meditation, long walks, and deep talks. My husband, Roger, was going to have to undergo a lot of debilitating radiation treatment of his throat. He would not be able to eat, swallow or talk. Temporarily.

We were assured that he would recover and live to tell about it. It was still one of the most difficult things we've ever gone through. As the 40 days of the Gratitude Groove unfolded, my husband got sicker and sicker. The outpouring of love and support that I received from the other women in the group was astonishing. I did not know these women and yet, I had an instant community of concern. And more than that, I had a daily reading to contemplate and a phone call with my friend. I got to write about my day to day experiences at this time through the lens of gratitude.

What perfect timing!

I did, indeed, find many things for which to be grateful. Primarily, I was grateful that my husband was alive. I was grateful that we lived in a big city and had access to the best doctors and treatments that the medical community had to offer. I was grateful for the love and support of friends and family. It came in unexpected ways: phone calls, letters, emails, visits, food and flower deliveries and prayer. I was grateful to my husband's business partner for stepping up and helping out. I was grateful to my children who allowed their needs to go temporarily on the back burner. I was grateful for the Wellness Community and the information and group support I got there. I was especially grateful to my husband for keeping intact his faith, pleasant disposition, and appreciation for life. I was grateful for the discipline of gratitude. Without it, I may have been lured into a "why me?" victim mentality, or hopelessness, or depression.

Today, my husband is post-treatment and his last PET scan showed no cancer cells. He continues to recover, gaining back 30 lost pounds and his strength. We have a few medical expenses, but did not lose our house like so many other Americans do in these times. Our marriage is stronger and our children survived without being the center of all of our attention for a few months! We are far more appreciative of our lives and actively choose gratitude as the only way to be.

I have learned that no matter how difficult the challenge, the right frame of mind determines whether or not we suffer. Let me say again, grateful people are happier people.


HOME TESTIMONIALS ABOUT GG ABOUT JILL ABOUT MARY KAY SIGN UP
	About Mary Kay My name is Mary Kay Cocharo. Who am I and what's my interest in gratitude? I am a woman in mid-life. I have been a student of one kind or another for about 50 years. I have been a psychotherapist for 23 years and a Certified Imago Relationship Therapist for 12 of those. In addition to having had the privilege of counseling hundreds of adults, adolescents and children, I have led and taught numerous workshops and classes. Some of my favorite topics include, "Beating the Holiday Blues", "Intimacy and Friendship", "Couplehood as a Spiritual Path", "Divorce Recovery" and "Gender Differences in Relationships". I have been a mother for nearly 27 years and am a daughter, sister, aunt, niece, cousin and a wife. I am a friend. I am, and always have been, someone who seeks to find deeper and richer connection to all things spiritual. As a psychotherapist, I've been an observer of humanity. I've seen suffering and have had the privilege of sharing in joy. I've heard many stories. I have been moved to tears, heartbroken, silenced, stimulated, and uplifted. My clients have been students and teachers and blessings. I have practiced Catholicism, learned to meditate, done yoga and studied Buddhism. I have Jewish and Muslim friends and have served as a board member for a Church of Religious Science. I believe in an intelligent Universe and I believe in the power of thought. I know that grateful people are happier people. In fall of 2007, I participated in The 40 day Gratitude Groove with one of my girlfriends. I've always believed that it takes 40 consecutive days to both learn a new habit and evolve spiritually through that new discipline . My Gratitude Girlfriend partner was going through a bitter divorce, and we tended to spend all of our time together complaining. I noticed that many of our pre-GG exchanges were based on commiseration, not celebration of our lives. I thought that focusing on gratitude would not only help us personally but would also be good for our friendship. On the day that I received my first Gratitude Groove email, my husband was diagnosed with Undifferentiated Squamous Cell Carcinoma of the Head and Neck. This is a fancy name for cancer. It was almost as if the Universe was saying, "Oh yeah, let's see if you can find some gratitude in this?!" The next week was a whirlwind of doctor's appointments, biopsies, second opinions, research, and shock. It was also a week of prayer, meditation, long walks, and deep talks. My husband, Roger, was going to have to undergo a lot of debilitating radiation treatment of his throat. He would not be able to eat, swallow or talk. Temporarily. We were assured that he would recover and live to tell about it. It was still one of the most difficult things we've ever gone through. As the 40 days of the Gratitude Groove unfolded, my husband got sicker and sicker. The outpouring of love and support that I received from the other women in the group was astonishing. I did not know these women and yet, I had an instant community of concern. And more than that, I had a daily reading to contemplate and a phone call with my friend. I got to write about my day to day experiences at this time through the lens of gratitude. What perfect timing! I did, indeed, find many things for which to be grateful. Primarily, I was grateful that my husband was alive. I was grateful that we lived in a big city and had access to the best doctors and treatments that the medical community had to offer. I was grateful for the love and support of friends and family. It came in unexpected ways: phone calls, letters, emails, visits, food and flower deliveries and prayer. I was grateful to my husband's business partner for stepping up and helping out. I was grateful to my children who allowed their needs to go temporarily on the back burner. I was grateful for the Wellness Community and the information and group support I got there. I was especially grateful to my husband for keeping intact his faith, pleasant disposition, and appreciation for life. I was grateful for the discipline of gratitude. Without it, I may have been lured into a "why me?" victim mentality, or hopelessness, or depression. Today, my husband is post-treatment and his last PET scan showed no cancer cells. He continues to recover, gaining back 30 lost pounds and his strength. We have a few medical expenses, but did not lose our house like so many other Americans do in these times. Our marriage is stronger and our children survived without being the center of all of our attention for a few months! We are far more appreciative of our lives and actively choose gratitude as the only way to be. I have learned that no matter how difficult the challenge, the right frame of mind determines whether or not we suffer. Let me say again, grateful people are happier people.